Reminiscing

Remember, that one time, before home buying and renovating and moving took over my life?  When I was talking about a wedding, and planning one on a small budget, and we discussed things like dresses and colors and stuff?  Yeah, me too.  That was awesome. 

So, as a nod to the good old days and an attempt to do something wedding related, I'm going dress shopping today. 

And do you remember that one time, when I was all "I'm pretty set on not wearing white...."  for all those practical reasons, like I have a kid and stuff?  Well, the dress I found that I really, really, really, like is white.  Of course. So, consider the crow eaten.  I expect this isn't the first time I'm going to make a statement that will have to be retracted later....

Paul, Art, You Were Mistaken

I have found a flaw with your logic, Simon and Garfunkel.  See, in the lyrics to "I Am a Rock" you claim you have "built walls/ A fortress deep and mighty."  By yourself? Really?  How'd that work out for you?  See, 'cause we're only switching out lighting fixtures and taking down cabinet doors, and we can't even do that by ourselves.  You must have had a second pair of hands.....

Last Friday we signed the papers and got the keys to our BRAND NEW HOUSE! (thank you Rod Roddy!) and immediately went over to start scoping it out.  (By "we", I'm referring to myself, Future Mr.  Husband, his parents and his mom's best friend, R. She inspected our house for us, and is an amazing jack of all trades, and a really awesome person.) Once there, we started holding up paint chips, unloading tools, making lists, and figuring out the quickest route to Home Depot.  One of the first things on the list were screen clips.  Why, you ask?  Because within 30 minutes of being in the house, our offspring pushed a screen out and went ass over teakettle out the window.  He's okay-just a bump and scratch on the head. I think it took about 5 years off my life, though.  And can I just tell you how incredibly grateful I was in that moment that we bought a one story house?

Anyway, we got to work immediately. Cupboard doors came off, primer started going on, counter tops were removed, ceiling fans came down.  If it were not for the incredible generosity of of the Future In Laws giving of their time, I'd probably still be standing in the living room in a daze, wondering where to begin.  Thanks to their divide-and-conquer attitude, the kitchen is well under way, a bright, shiny new ceiling fan is in the living room, and almost all of the light fixtures have been replaced. 

So put that in your pipe and smoke it, Simon and Garfunkel. Besides, y'all are singing the song together.....duh. 

Inventory

It won't be officialofficial until we close on Friday, but we're getting our house. The air conditioning issue has been resolved.  I've started packing. The give-away pile is growing. I bought two light fixtures today (thank you craigslist)  and Future Mr. Husband picked up a truckload of flooring yesterday.

I feel like I should be more excited, but it all feels very surreal at this point.  I think once Friday rolls around and the in laws are here and we have the keys in our hot little hands it will sink in and I'll start to get excited.  Right now what I'm mainly feeling is overwhelmed.

You see, I hate moving.  I really, really, hate moving.  I blame it on being a Capricorn. When I was a young and single gal, moving was a choice I made begrudgingly. It usually had to do with rent being raised beyond what I could afford.  And so, I'd carry home (yes, carry. I lived and worked downtown and didn't have a car for years)  boxes from work or the liquor store every day for about two weeks. I'd pack them up, bribe some friends who had cars with a promise of beer and pizza, and spend the better part of a Saturday shoving bookshelves into a Volkswagen.  Sunday I would unpack as much as possible and it was back to work on Monday; a little disoriented but not much worse for the wear. Within a week I had the place feeling like home again.

Each consecutive move since my young and single days has gotten more complicated.  To prepare for my move to Austin, I moved from a one bedroom to a more affordable studio apartment (in the same building, at least) where I stayed for a month. Then I moved everything into storage and moved myself onto my friend's couch for a month. Then she and I moved everything from storage into a U Haul, plus all her stuff, plus our combined sewing studio, across the country and into a house we shared in Austin.  After a year there, I got pregnant, she got married and we both moved out of that house. 

My  next move, of course, involved combining my household with Babydaddy's household, which means twice as much stuff.  We had barely started unpacking our things in that rental house, we were told it was about to be sold and we had to get the heck out.  So six weeks after moving in, we moved out and into the house where we are now. 

Over the two and half years that we've been living in our current home, we've managed to acquire a few things. For example:

a person
all the junk that person needs to keep him safe/fed/happy/busy

It's really quite staggering. In two years we've managed to fill an entire bedroom with furniture, a closet floor to ceiling with stuff he outgrew but we might need if and when we have another baby, and every available space that remains with his accouterments; bibs, bowls, spoons, sippy cups, potty chairs, yard toys, trikes and wheely things, toys, toys and toys upon toys.

We have exactly three weeks from this posting to get packed and moved.  While I'm here packing, tossing, organizing and sorting, the Future Husband will be working at his job during the day, and going to the new house after work to help his dad install floors, paint cabinets and do other things with tools.  I am more than happy to take over the responsibility of packing the house to free him up to work on the new house.  Me and tools don't get along so well. But like I said, it's a little overwhelming. Not only do I have an entire house to pack and organize, I have reading for school to do over spring break, regular life type-stuff, like laundry and meals to think about, and then there's that kid that follows me around and wants things.  So, a lot going on.

Right now the focus is to try to stay calm, do as much as I can without getting frantic and crazy about it, and remember to feed the toddler.  Wish me luck.

In Like a Lamb

Well, it wasn't exactly the fireworks and popping champagne corks that I had anticipated, but it looks like we're getting the house.  The issue with the air conditioner hasn't been totally resolved.  What we do have at this point, is a contract that says the owner will fix it before we close.   If, for some reason, the air conditioner can't be fixed and has to be replaced instead, we can still back out of the contract at that point without penalty.

I'm really hoping that doesn't happen. Especially since I've started packing. 

As far as wedding plans go, I'm feeling optimistic for late June.  We had originally ruled it out because the house we thought we were going to buy needed quite a bit of work.  At that time, we felt like June would really be pushing it and August was more reasonable. This house needs a lot less to make it livable (Let me rephrase that. The house is completely livable, if you like living in the 80's. I do not.  So it needs some updating.)

I would like to be clear that I said "I" am feeling optimistic for late June. Future Husband, apparently, isn't quite there yet.  When I delicately mentioned the possibility of maybe thinking about having the wedding in June, I got some sort of grumble about "stress" and "time" and I think I heard something about "nervous breakdown" as he exited the room. 

Here are my reasons for being so pushy about a June wedding:

1. I really want to get married in June.
2. Texas is really f-ing hot in August. I want our guests to be comfortable, not miserable. 
3. My BFF is a teacher in another city and August would be a hard time for her to travel, since she goes back to work mid-month.
4. Future Husband's cousin is getting married end of July.  Since a good bit of our guest lists will overlap, I want to give people time to recoup before traveling again.
5. I really want to get married in June.  I tried to be okay with another month, but there's just something about June....
6. I'm really ready to be married already!
7. The sooner we get married, the sooner we can take a honeymoon.  This last year has been pretty busy and stressful.  We could use a vacation.
8. June is a lovely month to be married.....

Besides, don't all weddings have at least one good nervous breakdown? 

Short but Sweet

We are thisclose to having our final answer on the house.  We had it inspected on Friday and everything looks great except for the air conditioner.  The seller will arrange to have it looked at today to determine if it is something that can be repaired, or if the entire unit needs replacing.  Repairing, he will work with us.  Replacing, not so much.  We're hopeful that it's an easy fix.

If all goes well, we move forward with closing on March 12.

Back in the Saddle

After the debacle that was the last attempt at purchasing a home, I was feeling like the best thing we could do for our poor, worn out selves, was find a less expensive rental, move, take a deep breath  and start over again in a month or so when the nausea from the last experience had worn off.

Best laid plans, right?

This past weekend just so happened to be our son's second birthday (sniffle, sob) which meant the inlaws were in town, which meant, we might as well go look at some houses while they're here.  They are such kind and generous souls that they have agreed to help us navigate the home buying process and assist with getting us started in our first home.

We started off looking at a handful of houses in our price range, in the areas we would want to live.  It was a gorgeous day, the sun was shining, we were rested from the birthday festivities, coffee-ed up and rarin' to go.   Being the eternal optimist that I am, (Holly, quit laughing) I had high hopes that today might be the day.  That we might see something extraordinary, something just right for us, something that wasn't falling down, or had holes in the roof, or reeked of cat urine, or backed up to a really bad neighborhood.  The first few houses we looked at were just that; dilapidated, falling down shacks in bad neighborhoods. My spirits were sinking as we drove to the one remaining house on our list. I took a deep breath and said to myself 'pleaselethisbetheone, pleaseletthisbetheone...'

We drove around the corner and into an adorable little neighborhood.  This looked promising.  A cute little house on a nice, clean, little street.  We pulled into the driveway and I swear, a  ray of sunshine came down from the clouds and the angel choir soundtrack started playing in the background.... Could this be it? It's so.....so.......not a total piece of crap. Fresh paint! Clean brick! Intact windows! It's not leaning to one direction!

Do you remember that scene in Beauty and the Beast, when the Beast blindfolds Belle and takes her to his library?  Do you remember how she spun around, taking in the beauty of all the books stacked three stories high? That's how I felt as our agent swung the door open and we we were met with only the smell of fresh paint.  Bright sunshine was streaming through the numerous windows. A huge fireplace hearth whispered 'come sit here and let me warm you...' Each of the two smaller bedrooms had surprisingly large closets.  The master suite had (drum roll please.....) HIS AND HERS CLOSETS. And a double vanity.  The kitchen was a perfect size, open to the rest of the house, and had a cute little bay window looking out into the back yard (the almost half an acre yard!)  Said yard was full of trees and shrubs, and surrounded by an upright, fully functioning fence.  A third detached garage sat proudly in the back yard just waiting to be filled with tools and projects.

While the house isn't exactly South Austin, where we live now, it's not very far from it.  We call it SouthSouth Austin, which is actually Buda; a quaint little community with a Main Street, a donut shop, plant stores, cafes and a train depot, and just about the cutest little library that ever did live.  It's in a great school district that we can get excited about, and just a hop, skip and a jump to a little place I fondly refer to as Disneyland for Rednecks, a.k.a. "Cabela's".  It is an outdoorsman's dream. Which I could give a rip about, but my man loves it.

I don't want to get too ahead of myself and set myself up for a huge letdown.  But I have to be honest and say that the first thing I thought of when I saw the yard in this house is how completely perfect it would be for a wedding. I mean, look: 

 Can't you just see us standing in that little circle, exchanging vows? If you squint and maybe green up the grass a bit?

I hope it isn't too good to be true.  It has been recently painted, inside and out. It's clean.  It lets in tons of light. Our son sat down and started playing in the yard immediately.  The neighbors waved.  The street was quiet.  There wasn't an eyesore, falling down, dilapidated house in sight.  It's less than a 15 minute commute for the future Mr. Husband. Best of all, it isn't short sale. 

We made an offer, and, as of this writing, we're officially under contract.  Cross your fingers.

Location, Location, Location

Well, that's done.  I have to say, letting go of the house is a mixed bag.  On the one hand, I feel tremendously relieved to just be done with the waiting and not knowing.  It opens up a world of possibilities; not waiting on a closing date, not wondering when we'll be moving, not wondering how long it will take and how much money it will cost to do renovations, not stressing out about if it'll all be done in time.....very freeing.  But the flip side of that is a little puzzling.  I mean, now what?

The future Mr. Husband and I have had a few brief conversations about the 'now what' and we haven't really come to any solid conclusions.  Our biggest priority right now is still finding somewhere to live.  We're a one income family by choice, and we're grateful that we've been able to make it work for as long as we have.  However, we'd been anticipating purchasing a home, and not only because it's a smart investment, but because the mortgage payments would be less than our rent is. Since the house didn't come to fruition, we still need to do something to free up some finances. It would be really nice to have a little extra dough from time to time,  to go out and have fun with, to put towards the wedding, and to set aside for our future.  So here we are, realizing if the house ain't happenin', we'd better move anyway, and probably sooner rather than later.

Now the plan is to find somewhere to rent for the immediate future that's more affordable, and start all over again with the house hunting. Square One. Square-o Uno.  Back to The Beginning. (Insert and enormous, bosom-heaving sigh here.)

Like I was saying. Freeing.  About the only thing we do know is that we would still like to get married this summer.  I mean, schedule wise it's what's easiest for friends and family, and fer cryin' out loud, it's time! I (ahem, I mean, 'we') have waited a LONG time for this! I'm ready to be a Mrs.  I'm ready to stop feeling silly when referring to my 'nephews' and 'in-laws'. I'm ready to upgrade from 'girlfriend' to 'wife', because it just feels weird at this point.

Ideally, in the next week or two, we'll find a lovely little house (that's NOT a short sale) and move in and slap some paint on the walls and set a date and get on with it. It's a dream I'm not quite ready to let go of.  I'm also open to looking at other venues.  I've done a little searching in the area for inexpensive venues and I haven't found anything terribly promising just yet.  It doesn't help that every time I start to look I get completely overwhelmed and walk away.  Mostly due to the fact that I don't know where to start looking.  I want it to be something meaningful or symbolic of 'us', but I mean, what is an expression of 'us'?  Park? Bar? Beach? Restaurant?Used car lot? Boat?

Even though I'd vetoed it from the beginning, I found myself revisiting the idea of a simple civil ceremony at the courthouse. I halfheartedly threw the idea out and was met with zero enthusiasm. and I admit, I can't really get on board with it either. The idea is nice; simple, intimate, quick and to the point. And yet.....somehow, not right for us. I don't want to make any rash decisions out of frustration, and I think a lot of Brides to Be toss around the idea for that very reason. Besides, my Beloved deserves more.  It might be my second time, but it's his first, and if he wants some bells and whistles, he should have some bells and whistles.

A friend of mine gave me a great piece of advice. She said that in order to really get a feel for what you want your wedding day to look like, each of you needs to sit down and write out key words that you want to describe your big day.  Compare lists, narrow it down to the 5 most important, and let that decide everything.  For example, if your words are; 'fresh, large, bouncy, loud, and pistachio", let everything reflect that.  Looking at band?  Well, are they fresh, large, bouncy, loud and pistachio?  Deciding on a cake?  Is it fresh, large, bouncy, loud, and pistachio?  You get the idea.

Guess we'll take this blank slate and head back to the drawing board.