Daisypath Wedding tickers

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Please Forgive Me



for not updating this long, long ago.  Let me just say that the wedding L E V E L E D me.  I didn't feel like it was taking that much out of me at the time, but the last few weeks have proved otherwise.  So in lieu of a lengthy, wordy update, I'll just let these lovelies speak for themselves.  And I'll write a more thorough update soon!

my two besties.
practically angelic, we are. 







serious stuff


hello husband.  have some pie.


Sunday, June 20, 2010

Croup Was Not on the List

I just caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and I have the biggest, puffiest, darkest circles under my eyes I think I've ever seen.  This will not do for wedding day pictures.

You see,  last week, The Wee One had this little fever.  Nothing to really worry about because it's happened a few times this spring already.  He sneezes a couple times, rubs his eyes, I break out the Benadryl and we're all good in a day or two.  But this time the fever came and went and came again. Then this cough.  Just a tickle at first, and then a gasping, wheezing, barking cough that got worse at night. I didn't need the pediatrician to tell me it was croup, but we went anyway, just to be on the safe side. 

Sure enough, a quick trip to the doc and two prescriptions later, we're home bound.  We've done all our puzzles and coloring books and stickers and markers and stamps and used up all our bubbles and tormented the dog and built a tent in the kitchen and made all the J-E-L-L-O we can stand and rocked and rocked and rocked and rocked and stood in the steamy bathroom and if I have to watch Mary Poppins one more time I'm going to lose it. Really and truly. (BTW, Redbox, you saved our weekend.)

I can't stand seeing my baby sick. No parent can; it just breaks your heart right down the middle. There is never a good time for a sick child.  No matter what the circumstances, it's exhausting. You're up and down all night: comforting, getting drinks of water, refilling the humidifier, administering medicine taking temperatures.  The fact that we are also trying to orchestrate a wedding and live our normal day to day lives has completely drained my reserves.  I'm depleted. Hence the bags.  Heck, the bags under my eyes have bags under them.

Since I can't his the pause button on life, we don't have any choice but to keep putting one foot in front of the other.  Today while our son napped I got as organized as humanly possible.  I have a To Do list broken down day by day until The Big Day.  Thankfully, starting Tuesday, help arrives.  And first on the roster: my parents.  My mom is pretty handy with a glue gun (That's a gross understatement by the way. With nothing more than a pile of Styrofoam peanuts and some floral wire my mom could pretty much reconstruct a life-size model of the Titanic. And do it better) and my dad is the type of guy that doesn't know what it means to put your feet up and relax.  

Next through the door will be my BFF of twenty-two years. That doesn't even seem possible, but we've both got the mortgages, kids and gray hairs to prove it.  She is my rock, my voice of reason, and my breath of fresh air, all rolled in one. She makes me laugh when no one else can, and laughs with me when no one else will. 

And last but certainly not least, my soon to be father-in-law will arrive, followed shortly by my soon to be mother-in-law and her BFF, a.k.a. 'the other mom'. Thankfully, they all already know their way around our house blindfolded, and are ready and willing to roll up their sleeves and help.  My mother in law cleaned our entire house, top to bottom when our son was born.  She vacuumed the base boards.  Not to mention the jillion loads of laundry and MONTHS worth of food she cooked and and froze for us.  In one weekend.  I will never forget that. 

We've got a LOT of ground to cover, a lot of yard to tidy up, a lot of lights to string and tables to set up and food to prepare. The next six days are going to be kind of nutty, but I am so, so looking forward to everyone that is so near and dear to us being here.  It isn't every day that family and friends come together like this, and I plan to soak in every minute of it.   

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Eleven Days!

And I've got a sick kiddo on my hands.  So in lieu of a long winded update, how are these for cute?

I'm quite proud of how the invites and favors turned out. 








Next up on the To Do List, order flowers.  I STILL haven't done that.  That will happen Wednesday morning when the flower lady gets back from her vacation. 

There are still a small handful of things to be done here and there, namely, assembling the music play list, but aside from that everything has to either happen the day before or the day of, or has been delegated to someone else.  Love you, babe!

Thursday, June 3, 2010

We Have Pie!

And not a moment too soon, if you ask me. I was starting to really wonder if there would be any food at this wedding at all.  The sweet little lady that sits outside the general store and sells baked goods has agreed to make ten pies for our wedding reception.  All that leaves to get ready are the drinks and maybe some fruit trays to round out the food table.  Totally doable. 

Last week I made a trip to my local grocery for some barbecuing supplies, and I took a lap through the flower department.  Lo and behold, I was impressed.  They had a nice assortment of really lovely, bright, reasonably priced bouquets. Just the sort I'd been looking for, in fact. Why had I not noticed this before?  Or, a better question would be, why did I overlook the grocery store that's five minutes away?  The woman working in the floral department was incredibly nice and helpful, and when I asked what would be available in a few weeks she was very reassuring that I could get the same assortments.  She said making a hand-tied bouquet for me would be no problem and they could do a simple one in the neighborhood of $20.  Twenty dollars! The people at Central Market wanted $65 just to talk about it....

Having those two details taken care of feels really good.  People will eat, I'll have something to hold on to.  The other big things we took care of this last week were finding My Love's suit and ordering our rings.  We found the suit Monday night on a marathon trip from mall to mall to mall, and in the end all our trouble paid off, because he got the whole thing for $80.  That's unheard of for a suit. I'd fully expected to blow the better half of the budget on his outfit.  He still needs some accessories, but that part is easy.  The rings we found online, from the comfort of our own home.  His is here, and absolutely perfect. Mine is in transit. 

We have 23 days to go, and so far, have only spent a little more than half our budget.  Can you believe it?  My little calculator thingy on theknot.com says we have just under $500 left to spend.  Which is good, because we still need to pay for those pies and flowers,  buy some beer and wine, get the marriage license......

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Almost a Mrs.

I'm sure you've all probably been wondering what I've been up to. Well, worry  no further, my minions.  All is well in the land of SoontobeWed.  We've just been very, very busy.  First, a weekend on the coast to unwind in the sand and surf.  Ahh, it's good to be a mom and command at least one day of total worship and appreciation.  See how he hard he works to make me feel appreciated?  He didn't even expect me to clean or cook that thing.

.

Then, back to reality where I wrapped up the semester and handed in my final papers.  Woot! Feels really good to have that done.  And then, holy crap, I'm getting married in THIRTY EIGHT DAYS so I'd better get moving.

Things are definitely starting to look up since my last post.

The shoes that didn't fit have been returned, and a cuter pair arrived a few days ago.  I didn't think it was possible, but I found shoes I love even more.  They are so adorable I sometimes confuse them with candy and want to take a bite.  I stashed them in the box on the top shelf, because walking down the aisle with teeth marks in my shoes would be weird.

The wedding invitations are done and mailed. Thank you, to the lovely and talented Mrs. Tuck.

The pies, well, I'm still working on the pies.  I left a message with a local 'pie lady' and I'm paaaatiently waiting to hear back.  (taptaptaptaptap)

We have a field trip to a farm planned for Saturday morning to go (hopefully) make arrangements for flowers.  The rest of the weekend is allotted for suit and ring shopping.

Tomorrow is Girl's Night and we'll be assembling favors.

The photographer has been coerced, er, confirmed.  We are so very, very lucky to have such talented and generous friends!

We met with another one of our dear friends (see above, about luckiness) who will officiate and have started a draft of the ceremony and vows. 

And so it goes.  Little by little, we're making it happen.

Sunday, May 2, 2010

The Storm Before the Calm

Naturally, right after I wrote that last post about love and everlasting sparkle and all that feely good stuff, s**t started falling apart. 

First, the cafe that was going to make the pies called and said they can't.  The cafe is for sale, and because they don't know when they might be closing their doors for good, they don't want to make a commitment they may not be able to keep.  I understand, and I'm grateful that they didn't tell me this a week before the wedding.  But still.  Now what am I supposed to do?

Second, the ONE florist in town turned me away.  I went in hoping to have a conversation about my ideas (big bouquets of whatever is in season, like you might find at a farmer's market) see if that might be something she could source for me, or at the very least, see about having her make my bouquet. Before I finished describing the look I was going for, she told me there are no local farmer's markets with flowers, I'd have to go to Dallas to find them, but I could try one wholesale outlet that might or might not have what I want.  Oh, but go early on the day of the wedding or they might be out of flowers already.  At that point she turned her attention away from me to someone else, and that was the end of that.  I stood there with my mouth gaping open for a minute before I realized we were done, and then I left. 

Third, after playing phone tag with someone at the hotel nearest us, I finally got to talk to a live person about blocking rooms for guests.  Wouldn't you know it, she had all sorts of questions for me that I didn't have answers for; like how many double occupancy rooms I need, how many single king rooms, and how many kids are coming.  On top of it, my phone was breaking up and I could only get about every other word, and she was saying important things like 'contract' and 'deadline.'

Lastly, the shoes I ordered to wear on the big day arrived.  They are too small.  The size I need is out of stock. 

So Friday afternoon I had a little meltdown.  It didn't help that my loving and supportive Husband to Be responded to my frustrations with "See, this is why I didn't want to have the wedding so soon...." Which was met with a look that turned our 85 degree day a bit cooler.  But I just had to have a June wedding, didn't I?   If you've ever seen Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, you understand why.  What can I say?  I'm a sucker for a musical.

Since I have no choice but to keep putting one foot in front of the other,  (one sad, naked foot) we move onward.

For the pies, I have a couple of ideas. One of them involves a rolling pin, ten pounds of flour, a couple of friends and probably a bottle of tequila. 

Flowers, well, I guess I'll start scoping out the grocery stores.  Not exactly my first choice, but definitely more affordable than having professional arrangements made.  Or, there's always the easement behind our house. It seems to be putting off something lovely and yellow.  I think it's called ragweed. 

Tomorrow, when I am fresh, I'll take a deep breath and peruse the contract for the hotel rooms. It can't be that complicated, right?

As for the shoes, at least piperlime.com has free shipping, both ways.  I'll return them, and start looking again.  (After I have a teeny weeny whiny tantrum because they were the only shoes I really really really loved and they would have been perfect and no other shoes will ever be just as perfect as they are.)

Thankfully, my dear, sweet (patient) and what-would-I-do-without-her Best Friend called today to offer up her pie making/flower arranging/shoe shopping services.  During the conversation she reminded me of a very important point:  None of that stuff matters.  It will all be perfect, however it turns out, no one will be the wiser if the shoes aren't my first choice or the pies are Sara Lee.  At the end of the day we will be husband and wife, and that's the only important thing.  It's funny, because I feel like I've heard that exact same thing somewhere else recently.....

Friday, April 30, 2010

Sparkle and Stuff

I had a tiny little epiphany this evening while perusing through some wedding porn.  In the back of my mind a little wheel has been turning that has been having second thoughts.  No, not those kind of second thoughts.  The kind of second thoughts you have when you see weddings like the ones here: http://www.stylemepretty.com/

I started to wonder if we should have planned this whole thing differently.  I started to wonder if we'll regret not pulling out all the stops.  You know, a really fancy venue with big round tables and crisp white tablecloths, carefully constructed floral arrangements, sparkly crystal candle things, an elaborate menu printed on fancy paper with loopy script, a big flowing dress and a three piece suit, limousines, rows of attendants, a DJ, and champagne fountains.

I have to admit, when I look at photographs of other people's weddings I think "Wow. Amazing. So beautiful! Look how they're glowing! So in love!" And then the "I wish we could do that....." or the "I wish I would have thought of that's" start to filter through.  And our own little backyard wedding starts to feel.....little.

So you want to know what the epiphany was?  While looking at all those pictures of those glowing brides in their thousand dollar gowns, and their fancy up-do's and elaborate table settings, I realized that 1) A lot of these couples are starting their marriages in serious debt to have been able to pull it all off 2) Guests don't usually remember things like the chandeliers or the bows on the chairs,  or what font the menu was printed in or what kind of flowers were in the centerpiece. (They remember what they gave you, how much it cost, and if they got a thank you note or not. ) And 3) All of that fancy sparkly glittery stuff? That's all it does; sparkle and glitter.  It's a visual cue to the observer that this day means something. Well, duh.  You don't need tulle and a 12 piece band to make that clear.

Here is what I know.  Our wedding day will be beautiful and meaningful.  When it's over, the flowers will wither, the dress will be hung in the closet and the lights will be taken down.  But the things that made our wedding day special will remain: our son, our vows, our families, our friends and our home. Those things are the real sparkle in our lives, and they're the things that last.  Nothing makes me happier than seeing our son smile, watching my man walk through the door at the end of the day,  spending time with friends and laughing until we cry or pee or both, and making time to be together as a family.  How very lucky we are. 

Monday, April 26, 2010

Getting S**t Done.

With two months to go before the wedding, I'm feeling the pressure.  Thankfully, the major bulk of the remodel is behind us, and with that, the wedding preparations seem to be gathering momentum all on their own. I had a feeling this would be the case, and in order to prepare for this moment, I opened a new checking account at our new bank and deposited $1000. 

The first thing I did last week was email a couple of barbecue joints around town to get a catering quote.  I had a feeling a full blown dinner would be way out of our budget, but for the sake of research, I did it anyway. One place never got back to me, and the other place sent me a quote of $850 for 100 people.  That would be 85% of our budget, so clearly that's a no go.  After a quick convo with the Intended about nixing diner altogether, we decided we'd rather just do dessert, iced tea, wine and beer.  Since we're not really 'cake' people (Well, I am. I'll eat anything sweet.  But My Love, not so much.  And it's about him as much as it is me. Right?) our dessert of choice will be pies.  Lots and lots of pies.  And what is more perfect for a picnic than pie?

Anywho, I emailed a local bakery for a quote and (as of this writing) haven't heard back.  I'm a little familiar with what they do, and have a rough idea of what dessert would cost if we used them. We're taking in the neighborhood of $200, which isn't terrible considering the entire budget for reception food and beverage is $405.  However, there's a little mom and pop diner/bakery on Main Street in downtown Buda that does pie, and on Friday evening I popped in and talked to them about a custom order.  The quote they gave me was half what the other one is likely to be.  So, one of my tasks for next week is to stop in and have a piece of pie to see if it's tasty.  A terrible chore, I know.  But someone's gotta do it.  

Next up on the list: shoes.  I'd been looking online for a while, and found a pair that I absolutely adore. I'm not going to tell you what they look like just yet, because I was there to be some surprise on the actual day. Let's just say they're freakin' adorable, from piperlime.com and were a total of $32.46.  Not too shabby, considering the budget for my entire ensemble is $60 and I already have the dress!

I also went ahead and and started a wedding registry.  I went around and around for the longest time about even having a registry.  For one, it feels weird to make a list of all the things you want so other people can get them for you.  Not to mention we're not exactly spring chickens flying the coop with nary a sheet or towel to our names.  And third, I think Emily Post or Miss Manners or someone I hold in high regard says it's tacky, especially if it's a second wedding.  But just because it's my second time around, why should The Mister be punished forever with mismatched plates and old scratchy towels?  

Friday afternoon I left the kiddo with his dad and made a trip to Hobby Lobby to get the supplies to make the wedding invitations.  I found some paper online that I wanted to use, but as luck would have it, they didn't carry it in the store.  Rather than get discouraged (because with two months to go, I don't really have time for that) I went with plan B which was......well, I just sort of made it up right there on the spot.  And I have to say, I  am pretty pleased with  myself.  I'm still tweaking the final design, but I think I'm on the right track.  I'll post a picture when I have one finished.

While I was there I also picked up some card stock for the wedding favors.  My plan is to cover matchboxes with pretty paper (something like this: http://blog.lilacandivy.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/Matchboxes.jpg) and scatter them around in conspicuous places along with fistfuls of sparklers.

So, since this blog is all about budget, let's have a little recap and see where we're at, shall we?  (Oh, and remember that post when I was all like "I"m not telling you how much I spent on the dress 'cause you'll judge me?" Yeah....I had a 'duh' moment when I realized that sort of defeats the whole intention of writing about a budget.....)

So in the interest of full disclosure, here we go: 

Reception Venue Rentals  $80.00             Actual spent to date: $0
  
Food Service   $300.00                             Actual spent to date: $0

Beverages    $80.00                                  Actual spent to date: $0

Cake(s) & Cutting Fee   $25.00               Actual spent to date: $0

The Gown & Alterations   $60.00           Actual spent to date: $11
   
Bride's Accessories   $10.00                   Actual spent to date: $32.46
   
Hair  & Makeup  $5.00                           Actual spent to date: $0

Prewedding Pampering $5.00                Actual spent to date: $8 (brow wax, courtesy groupon.com)
   
Groom's Tux or Suit $6.00                    Actual spent to date: $0
 
Groom's Accessories $3.00                   Actual spent to date: $0

Officiant Fee/Donation $10.00              Actual spent to date: $0
 
Bride's Bouquet $7.50                           Actual spent to date: $0

Groom & Groomsmen Boutonnieres  $2.00      Actual spent to date: $0
   
Reception Decorations & Centerpieces   $40.00       Actual spent to date: $69.00 (white xmas lights and a roll of ribbon)

Ceremony Decorations  $14.00               Actual spent to date: see above
  
Photographer   $60.00                            Actual spent to date: $0
   
Videographer   $50.00                          Actual spent to date: $0

Additional Prints & Videos   $10.00    Actual spent to date: $0
   
Invitations &Reply Cards   $25.00      Actual spent to date: $10.24

Other Stationery   $5.00                     Actual spent to date: $0
 
His Ring   $10.00                               Actual spent to date: $0
   
Her Ring   $10.00                              Actual spent to date: $0

Favors   $15.00                                 Actual spent to date: $12.74

As you can see, we're making good progress.  I still have a few concerns; mainly finding a photographer who's willing to work for, well, er, pie, and finding something for the future husband to wear that doesn't blow the whole budget out of the water.  

And now, for your pure viewing pleasure (and to change the subject, because I'm starting to feel stressed out) how's this for the cutest little fella you ever did see? 

Monday, April 19, 2010

Time Is(n't) On My Side....

It's been twelve days since my last post and I have no idea where the time went.  If our wedding day sneaks up on me this quickly we are in big, big trouble.  I'm picturing slapping some makeup on, a box of cookies and some juice boxes for the kids.  You know, the stuff nightmares are made of. 

In my last post I may have understated how much we'd accomplished on the remodeling front just a wee bit.  Like, did I mention the two bathrooms we still had to totally renovate?  My Future Father in Law came (and has been here for two weeks now) to retile, regrout, retoilet, remove and redo the master bath.



Before                                                                                           After                                                                               


Once that was accomplished, he retiled the floor of the other bath, regrouted the shower and ripped out the sink cabinet and replaced it with a pedestal sink.

Before                                                                                                                     After













 Let me first say I don't have room to complain.  About anything.  We are extremely lucky to have such a generous man in our lives who is so completely willing to come and give up his time and energy to do the remodeling for us.  If left to our own devices it either wouldn't happen or would take years to accomplish.  I will be eternally grateful to him for all his hard work.  That said, living in a construction zone isn't easy. Keeping the Wee One out of the way, out of the tools and out of the buckets of gunk is tiring.  The weather hasn't helped because it's keeping us inside most of the time and as if that wasn't enough, due to some car trouble, we're kinda stranded at the house.  Anyone that knows me knows that I don't tolerate messes very well.  Let's just say the last couple of weeks, between the weather and the renovating, the state of my floors has been enough to push me to the brink. But what can I do?  Nothing. Knowing it's futile to do anything about it until it's done just gives me something to wring my hands over. (At the time of this posting, the FFIL has left, and I vacuumed up the first layer of crud. Hooray!)

So instead of wringing my hands uselessly, I'm updating my minions.  Only, I don't have much to update about. I'm thinking about invitations.  I'm thinking about food.  I'm thinking about a suit and flowers and starting to really, really seriously get kinda freaked out that the wedding is happening in roughly 10 weeks.  Oh yeah, did I mention we set a date?  The last Saturday of June, the 26th.  We're committed, and I think I'm overwhelmed.  My inner dialogue lately has been "I can do this. How hard can it be?  All I need is to find some catering we can afford, get The Mister a suit and figure out some flowers. We're practically done!"  And then I think oh wait. We need an officiant.  And a wedding license.  And maybe some rings.  And I should block out some hotel rooms.  Should I do a save the date?  Do I need to? What about a registry? We'll probably want pictures of our wedding, so I should find a photographer.  And we'll want music, so......I should do something about that, too.

I started a checklist on theknot.com, and according to that, I should send out the wedding invitations three months in advance. Three months?? Since when is that the norm?  I always thought it was three to 4 weeks....did something change?

Also, according to that checklist, I have 140 things left to do.

Gulp.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Wedding Porn

You gotta check out this wedding:

http://offbeatbride.com/2010/04/outdoor-indiana-wedding

Done?  Ok. I love this wedding for so many reasons.   Let's review, shall we?  First, the very first thing she says is 'we took everything we loved and rolled it into one crazy night.'  For some reason, probably because I'm a wee bit controlling about things,  I've been concerned about not having a 'theme' that runs through our wedding.  You know, like a beach theme, or boats or camping or whatever it is that brought and keeps us together. I kept feeling like if we didn't have a theme that represented how we met or some binding feature of our relationship that it meant we weren't good together.  How stupid is that?  I'm not sure where I got that idea,  but I felt like it was something I was 'supposed' to do, so I was stuck on it.  But then, over time, as the 'feel' of our wedding started to evolve,  I realized the theme is us.  And that's enough.  We are good together. Great, in fact. We're solid and strong and committed and that's all I need. I don't need sea shell shaped place holders or a cutesy cake topper to tell me that. (Not that there's anything wrong with those things!)  So it's refreshing and reassuring to see I'm not the only one that feels that way.  Towards the end of her post she even says "forget the 'theme' wedding." Excellent advice.

Moving on.  Reason number two I love this wedding?  Peeps. They're freakin' adorable. Disgusting, but oh so cute.

My third reason is three words. Tan. Vintage. Suit.  And the part about it being $12.  Twelve dollars! Can you believe it?  I'm so grateful to the bride for the idea to check out vintage stores for something for the Future Mr. Husband to wear.  Not that I have a clue how to pick out a suit or would even attempt to try to figure out what would fit, but it will make for a fun outing in the near future!

In my last post I said I was going dress shopping. And just to bring you up to date, I went to the store that had a dress I'd found online that looked perfect.  The only one they had was a size 11, and too big.  So I took a stroll across the hall to another store, and lo and behold, an almost identical dress, but cuter, and about a third of the price.  I don't want to reveal exactly how much I paid for said dress, lest anyone be so distracted by the price that they find themselves thinking "She paid $_____ for that dress???"  as I walk down the aisle instead of "Geez, I'm so happy for these guys!" But lets just say that I came in WELL under my $60 budget, leaving a good chunk for shoes, accessories and foundation garments (that's fancy for 'underwear', babe. If you're reading this.)

So.  On another note, we're moved into our house.  We are also making HUGE progress getting unpacked. I'm kicking myself for not taking 'before' and 'after' pictures from when we had boxes stacked everywhere and what it looks like now.  One of the many, many, many things that I love about  my FMH is that he has amazing sticktoittiveness. That man does not rest until the job is done, no matter what it is.  It keeps me motivated.  Just when I'm overwhelmed from unpacking and trying all day long to decide what goes where and I'm ready to call it good enough, he steps in with fresh perspective and helps finish up the last handful of boxes and gets me through the hump of not knowing where to put stuff anymore.  We have been kicking butt getting this place in order; the kitchen is soclose to being done, the attic is full of baby stuff and Christmas decorations, and the garage is well on it's way to actually being able to house our cars.  We still have some projects to do, of course.  Our closets need some attention, we've got too much kitchen stuff and not enough storage and the kiddo's room needs a toy box in a major way. But at this point everything we have left to do hinges on new furniture, and that takes time to acquire.

I'm so proud of us.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Reminiscing

Remember, that one time, before home buying and renovating and moving took over my life?  When I was talking about a wedding, and planning one on a small budget, and we discussed things like dresses and colors and stuff?  Yeah, me too.  That was awesome. 

So, as a nod to the good old days and an attempt to do something wedding related, I'm going dress shopping today. 

And do you remember that one time, when I was all "I'm pretty set on not wearing white...."  for all those practical reasons, like I have a kid and stuff?  Well, the dress I found that I really, really, really, like is white.  Of course. So, consider the crow eaten.  I expect this isn't the first time I'm going to make a statement that will have to be retracted later....

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Paul, Art, You Were Mistaken

I have found a flaw with your logic, Simon and Garfunkel.  See, in the lyrics to "I Am a Rock" you claim you have "built walls/ A fortress deep and mighty."  By yourself? Really?  How'd that work out for you?  See, 'cause we're only switching out lighting fixtures and taking down cabinet doors, and we can't even do that by ourselves.  You must have had a second pair of hands.....

Last Friday we signed the papers and got the keys to our BRAND NEW HOUSE! (thank you Rod Roddy!) and immediately went over to start scoping it out.  (By "we", I'm referring to myself, Future Mr.  Husband, his parents and his mom's best friend, R. She inspected our house for us, and is an amazing jack of all trades, and a really awesome person.) Once there, we started holding up paint chips, unloading tools, making lists, and figuring out the quickest route to Home Depot.  One of the first things on the list were screen clips.  Why, you ask?  Because within 30 minutes of being in the house, our offspring pushed a screen out and went ass over teakettle out the window.  He's okay-just a bump and scratch on the head. I think it took about 5 years off my life, though.  And can I just tell you how incredibly grateful I was in that moment that we bought a one story house?

Anyway, we got to work immediately. Cupboard doors came off, primer started going on, counter tops were removed, ceiling fans came down.  If it were not for the incredible generosity of of the Future In Laws giving of their time, I'd probably still be standing in the living room in a daze, wondering where to begin.  Thanks to their divide-and-conquer attitude, the kitchen is well under way, a bright, shiny new ceiling fan is in the living room, and almost all of the light fixtures have been replaced. 

So put that in your pipe and smoke it, Simon and Garfunkel. Besides, y'all are singing the song together.....duh. 

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Inventory

It won't be officialofficial until we close on Friday, but we're getting our house. The air conditioning issue has been resolved.  I've started packing. The give-away pile is growing. I bought two light fixtures today (thank you craigslist)  and Future Mr. Husband picked up a truckload of flooring yesterday.

I feel like I should be more excited, but it all feels very surreal at this point.  I think once Friday rolls around and the in laws are here and we have the keys in our hot little hands it will sink in and I'll start to get excited.  Right now what I'm mainly feeling is overwhelmed.

You see, I hate moving.  I really, really, hate moving.  I blame it on being a Capricorn. When I was a young and single gal, moving was a choice I made begrudgingly. It usually had to do with rent being raised beyond what I could afford.  And so, I'd carry home (yes, carry. I lived and worked downtown and didn't have a car for years)  boxes from work or the liquor store every day for about two weeks. I'd pack them up, bribe some friends who had cars with a promise of beer and pizza, and spend the better part of a Saturday shoving bookshelves into a Volkswagen.  Sunday I would unpack as much as possible and it was back to work on Monday; a little disoriented but not much worse for the wear. Within a week I had the place feeling like home again.

Each consecutive move since my young and single days has gotten more complicated.  To prepare for my move to Austin, I moved from a one bedroom to a more affordable studio apartment (in the same building, at least) where I stayed for a month. Then I moved everything into storage and moved myself onto my friend's couch for a month. Then she and I moved everything from storage into a U Haul, plus all her stuff, plus our combined sewing studio, across the country and into a house we shared in Austin.  After a year there, I got pregnant, she got married and we both moved out of that house. 

My  next move, of course, involved combining my household with Babydaddy's household, which means twice as much stuff.  We had barely started unpacking our things in that rental house, we were told it was about to be sold and we had to get the heck out.  So six weeks after moving in, we moved out and into the house where we are now. 

Over the two and half years that we've been living in our current home, we've managed to acquire a few things. For example:

a person
all the junk that person needs to keep him safe/fed/happy/busy

It's really quite staggering. In two years we've managed to fill an entire bedroom with furniture, a closet floor to ceiling with stuff he outgrew but we might need if and when we have another baby, and every available space that remains with his accouterments; bibs, bowls, spoons, sippy cups, potty chairs, yard toys, trikes and wheely things, toys, toys and toys upon toys.

We have exactly three weeks from this posting to get packed and moved.  While I'm here packing, tossing, organizing and sorting, the Future Husband will be working at his job during the day, and going to the new house after work to help his dad install floors, paint cabinets and do other things with tools.  I am more than happy to take over the responsibility of packing the house to free him up to work on the new house.  Me and tools don't get along so well. But like I said, it's a little overwhelming. Not only do I have an entire house to pack and organize, I have reading for school to do over spring break, regular life type-stuff, like laundry and meals to think about, and then there's that kid that follows me around and wants things.  So, a lot going on.

Right now the focus is to try to stay calm, do as much as I can without getting frantic and crazy about it, and remember to feed the toddler.  Wish me luck.

Thursday, March 4, 2010

In Like a Lamb

Well, it wasn't exactly the fireworks and popping champagne corks that I had anticipated, but it looks like we're getting the house.  The issue with the air conditioner hasn't been totally resolved.  What we do have at this point, is a contract that says the owner will fix it before we close.   If, for some reason, the air conditioner can't be fixed and has to be replaced instead, we can still back out of the contract at that point without penalty.

I'm really hoping that doesn't happen. Especially since I've started packing. 

As far as wedding plans go, I'm feeling optimistic for late June.  We had originally ruled it out because the house we thought we were going to buy needed quite a bit of work.  At that time, we felt like June would really be pushing it and August was more reasonable. This house needs a lot less to make it livable (Let me rephrase that. The house is completely livable, if you like living in the 80's. I do not.  So it needs some updating.)

I would like to be clear that I said "I" am feeling optimistic for late June. Future Husband, apparently, isn't quite there yet.  When I delicately mentioned the possibility of maybe thinking about having the wedding in June, I got some sort of grumble about "stress" and "time" and I think I heard something about "nervous breakdown" as he exited the room. 

Here are my reasons for being so pushy about a June wedding:

1. I really want to get married in June.
2. Texas is really f-ing hot in August. I want our guests to be comfortable, not miserable. 
3. My BFF is a teacher in another city and August would be a hard time for her to travel, since she goes back to work mid-month.
4. Future Husband's cousin is getting married end of July.  Since a good bit of our guest lists will overlap, I want to give people time to recoup before traveling again.
5. I really want to get married in June.  I tried to be okay with another month, but there's just something about June....
6. I'm really ready to be married already!
7. The sooner we get married, the sooner we can take a honeymoon.  This last year has been pretty busy and stressful.  We could use a vacation.
8. June is a lovely month to be married.....

Besides, don't all weddings have at least one good nervous breakdown? 

Monday, March 1, 2010

Short but Sweet

We are thisclose to having our final answer on the house.  We had it inspected on Friday and everything looks great except for the air conditioner.  The seller will arrange to have it looked at today to determine if it is something that can be repaired, or if the entire unit needs replacing.  Repairing, he will work with us.  Replacing, not so much.  We're hopeful that it's an easy fix.

If all goes well, we move forward with closing on March 12.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Back in the Saddle

After the debacle that was the last attempt at purchasing a home, I was feeling like the best thing we could do for our poor, worn out selves, was find a less expensive rental, move, take a deep breath  and start over again in a month or so when the nausea from the last experience had worn off.

Best laid plans, right?

This past weekend just so happened to be our son's second birthday (sniffle, sob) which meant the inlaws were in town, which meant, we might as well go look at some houses while they're here.  They are such kind and generous souls that they have agreed to help us navigate the home buying process and assist with getting us started in our first home.

We started off looking at a handful of houses in our price range, in the areas we would want to live.  It was a gorgeous day, the sun was shining, we were rested from the birthday festivities, coffee-ed up and rarin' to go.   Being the eternal optimist that I am, (Holly, quit laughing) I had high hopes that today might be the day.  That we might see something extraordinary, something just right for us, something that wasn't falling down, or had holes in the roof, or reeked of cat urine, or backed up to a really bad neighborhood.  The first few houses we looked at were just that; dilapidated, falling down shacks in bad neighborhoods. My spirits were sinking as we drove to the one remaining house on our list. I took a deep breath and said to myself 'pleaselethisbetheone, pleaseletthisbetheone...'

We drove around the corner and into an adorable little neighborhood.  This looked promising.  A cute little house on a nice, clean, little street.  We pulled into the driveway and I swear, a  ray of sunshine came down from the clouds and the angel choir soundtrack started playing in the background.... Could this be it? It's so.....so.......not a total piece of crap. Fresh paint! Clean brick! Intact windows! It's not leaning to one direction!

Do you remember that scene in Beauty and the Beast, when the Beast blindfolds Belle and takes her to his library?  Do you remember how she spun around, taking in the beauty of all the books stacked three stories high? That's how I felt as our agent swung the door open and we we were met with only the smell of fresh paint.  Bright sunshine was streaming through the numerous windows. A huge fireplace hearth whispered 'come sit here and let me warm you...' Each of the two smaller bedrooms had surprisingly large closets.  The master suite had (drum roll please.....) HIS AND HERS CLOSETS. And a double vanity.  The kitchen was a perfect size, open to the rest of the house, and had a cute little bay window looking out into the back yard (the almost half an acre yard!)  Said yard was full of trees and shrubs, and surrounded by an upright, fully functioning fence.  A third detached garage sat proudly in the back yard just waiting to be filled with tools and projects.

While the house isn't exactly South Austin, where we live now, it's not very far from it.  We call it SouthSouth Austin, which is actually Buda; a quaint little community with a Main Street, a donut shop, plant stores, cafes and a train depot, and just about the cutest little library that ever did live.  It's in a great school district that we can get excited about, and just a hop, skip and a jump to a little place I fondly refer to as Disneyland for Rednecks, a.k.a. "Cabela's".  It is an outdoorsman's dream. Which I could give a rip about, but my man loves it.

I don't want to get too ahead of myself and set myself up for a huge letdown.  But I have to be honest and say that the first thing I thought of when I saw the yard in this house is how completely perfect it would be for a wedding. I mean, look: 

 Can't you just see us standing in that little circle, exchanging vows? If you squint and maybe green up the grass a bit?

I hope it isn't too good to be true.  It has been recently painted, inside and out. It's clean.  It lets in tons of light. Our son sat down and started playing in the yard immediately.  The neighbors waved.  The street was quiet.  There wasn't an eyesore, falling down, dilapidated house in sight.  It's less than a 15 minute commute for the future Mr. Husband. Best of all, it isn't short sale. 

We made an offer, and, as of this writing, we're officially under contract.  Cross your fingers.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Location, Location, Location

Well, that's done.  I have to say, letting go of the house is a mixed bag.  On the one hand, I feel tremendously relieved to just be done with the waiting and not knowing.  It opens up a world of possibilities; not waiting on a closing date, not wondering when we'll be moving, not wondering how long it will take and how much money it will cost to do renovations, not stressing out about if it'll all be done in time.....very freeing.  But the flip side of that is a little puzzling.  I mean, now what?

The future Mr. Husband and I have had a few brief conversations about the 'now what' and we haven't really come to any solid conclusions.  Our biggest priority right now is still finding somewhere to live.  We're a one income family by choice, and we're grateful that we've been able to make it work for as long as we have.  However, we'd been anticipating purchasing a home, and not only because it's a smart investment, but because the mortgage payments would be less than our rent is. Since the house didn't come to fruition, we still need to do something to free up some finances. It would be really nice to have a little extra dough from time to time,  to go out and have fun with, to put towards the wedding, and to set aside for our future.  So here we are, realizing if the house ain't happenin', we'd better move anyway, and probably sooner rather than later.

Now the plan is to find somewhere to rent for the immediate future that's more affordable, and start all over again with the house hunting. Square One. Square-o Uno.  Back to The Beginning. (Insert and enormous, bosom-heaving sigh here.)

Like I was saying. Freeing.  About the only thing we do know is that we would still like to get married this summer.  I mean, schedule wise it's what's easiest for friends and family, and fer cryin' out loud, it's time! I (ahem, I mean, 'we') have waited a LONG time for this! I'm ready to be a Mrs.  I'm ready to stop feeling silly when referring to my 'nephews' and 'in-laws'. I'm ready to upgrade from 'girlfriend' to 'wife', because it just feels weird at this point.

Ideally, in the next week or two, we'll find a lovely little house (that's NOT a short sale) and move in and slap some paint on the walls and set a date and get on with it. It's a dream I'm not quite ready to let go of.  I'm also open to looking at other venues.  I've done a little searching in the area for inexpensive venues and I haven't found anything terribly promising just yet.  It doesn't help that every time I start to look I get completely overwhelmed and walk away.  Mostly due to the fact that I don't know where to start looking.  I want it to be something meaningful or symbolic of 'us', but I mean, what is an expression of 'us'?  Park? Bar? Beach? Restaurant?Used car lot? Boat?

Even though I'd vetoed it from the beginning, I found myself revisiting the idea of a simple civil ceremony at the courthouse. I halfheartedly threw the idea out and was met with zero enthusiasm. and I admit, I can't really get on board with it either. The idea is nice; simple, intimate, quick and to the point. And yet.....somehow, not right for us. I don't want to make any rash decisions out of frustration, and I think a lot of Brides to Be toss around the idea for that very reason. Besides, my Beloved deserves more.  It might be my second time, but it's his first, and if he wants some bells and whistles, he should have some bells and whistles.

A friend of mine gave me a great piece of advice. She said that in order to really get a feel for what you want your wedding day to look like, each of you needs to sit down and write out key words that you want to describe your big day.  Compare lists, narrow it down to the 5 most important, and let that decide everything.  For example, if your words are; 'fresh, large, bouncy, loud, and pistachio", let everything reflect that.  Looking at band?  Well, are they fresh, large, bouncy, loud and pistachio?  Deciding on a cake?  Is it fresh, large, bouncy, loud, and pistachio?  You get the idea.

Guess we'll take this blank slate and head back to the drawing board.

Thursday, February 11, 2010

Rainy Day Woes, and Little to do With a Wedding

Let's take a diversion for a moment, shall we?  It's been a few days since I've posted, and it's mostly due to the fact that I haven't had anything nice to say.  Instead of spewing all over the place, I've been taking Thumper's advice and not saying anything at all. However, that's left me feeling really stuck, and every time I've sat down and attempted to write something cheery and wedding-y, I've ended up scrapping it and walking away.  So I figured, what the hell. I might as well write about this funk I'm in and see if that doesn't help get me out of it.

As most of you are aware, we've been trying to buy a house for quite some time now.  We put an offer on this house last July.  July of 2009.  Makes it sound like eons ago, doesn't it?   It feels like it, too.  The house is a short sale, which just means that the people selling it are selling it 'short' of what they actually owe. It also means that attempting to buy such a house is a long and arduous process.  Looking back, I think if we'd known then what we know now, we might have thought twice about making the offer. But, here we are, seven months later, still waiting on the bank for a response. We actually did have our offer approved, in early January (just before we left town for a 10 day vacation....isn't that how it always goes?) and while we were gone a flurry of activity happened. The result of that activity was discovering some expensive foundation repairs were in order.  We weren't going to give it all up over just that though, so we revised our offer and resubmitted it to the sellers.  They declined.  And after some careful consideration on their part, they reconsidered, and accepted our new offer. Which meant starting the entire process over again; new contract, new paperwork.....and that's where we are today.  Waiting for (another) approval from the bank.

What's different about this time is that the sellers are scheduled to go into foreclosure soon.  When we drew up the new contract, we put in a closing date of February 15th. At this point, it's looking extremely unlikely that anything will have  happened by then. Especially considering a couple of days ago we received a quick update from the listing agent to let us know that the bank had our complete file, but a negotiator had not been assigned yet. 

So our plan is this.  On Monday the 15th, if we haven't gotten a response from the bank, we're pulling the plug.  The offer is off the table. No more waiting, no more negotiation, no more pestering the bank for information.  In theory, we could just wait it out until the end of the month.  If the house goes into foreclosure, then we know we're really done.  (Unless, of course, we want to go to the auction and try to bid on the house then....but the very thought of prolonging this any longer makes me ill.) So we've decided on the 15th as our D(one) Day.  For our sanity and well being, we have to move on with our lives.  Everything has been on hold for months now, to say we're sick of it is a gross understatement. 

To compound matters even further, we've been having a run of positively awful weather.  It's not helping my disposition in the least. It's been gray, cold and rainy for what feels like decades.  The sun has peeked out a couple of times, but even when it has it's still been miserably cold. Being cooped up indoors with a two year-old and trying to think of things to keep him busy has been numbing and exhausting. 

One way or the other, come Monday, I'll have a new outlook on life.  Knowing if we're buying a house or not will be incredibly freeing.  We can get on with planning our lives, our wedding, and our future.

Friday, February 5, 2010

The Dress; Part Deux

Remember that cheerful little ditty at the end of the last post?  Out of all those choices (wishing yourself dead, ashamed of yourself, ashamed of your man, sinking spirits, etc.) clearly white is the way to go.  Followed closely by blue, and trailed by the not entirely awful brown.  Well, I'm pretty set on not wearing white, not for any other reason than I have a toddler and I can expect it would stay clean for maybe 5 minutes, tops. Especially since we're planning outdoor nuptials.  As I stated previously, blue is traditionally associated with purity and virginity, and I really doubt we're fooling anyone there. What with the child and all, that's a hard one to pull off. I'd actually considered blue for a while, but now that I have that association in my head, I'm afraid I'd feel silly wearing it.

Which brings us to brown, and interestingly enough, I've been leaning towards brown.  Well, not exactly  brown, per se, as in dirt color.  But more of a soft, mocha, or creamy hot chocolate brown. Accented with a nice, soft vanilla white and maybe another color thrown in for fun.  Purple? Green? Think a chocolate/vanilla twist soft serve frozen yogurt with sprinkles.

So, with that in mind, I drug a willing and patient friend to a big chain bridal store and had a really, erm, interesting experience.  The staff was rude, disorganized and harried.  Not to mention unprofessional and just all around irritating. My intention for this field trip was to go and try on a handful of dresses, get ideas for fit, length, style, take some notes and head for the fabric store.  Naturally, I found a dress I love. But according to my budget I'm allotted $60 for the dress, and it retails for $100. Don't get me wrong, $100 for a wedding dress is incredibly reasonable, considering the headline on a recent bridal magazine proudly announced "Affordable dresses under $2,000!" I'm holding off on ordering it until I do some more looking.  Since it's a pretty popular chain store, I'm not entirely ruling out find the same dress in the color I want on Ebay or craigslist.  And without a date for the wedding nailed down, I'm not exactly feeling pressed for time. 

On that note, we don't have any new news on the house situation.  But, there is an end in sight. One way or the other, we will have our answer by the middle of February.  Of course, we're hoping that the news is good and the bank gives us the green light to go ahead with closing.  If not, well, expect some kvetching and whining while I reassess and start trying to come up with Plan B.

Monday, February 1, 2010

Let's talk taffeta

We have the budget sketched out. We have a place in mind, we have a goal to work towards and we have some rough ideas about look, feel, and atmosphere.

Let's move on to some more exciting topics, shall we?  You know what I'm getting at, ladies.

The Dress.

Naturally, moments after the ring was placed on my finger,  I began surfing websites for wedding dresses.  I feel a little lucky in this aspect of the planning because 1) Big, poufy, full, hoop skirt, lacy, train, veil and bustle; these are not words in my vocabulary. Which is good because all these adjectives often equal expensive. 2) This will be 'take two' of my Trip Down the Aisle, and when it comes to wedding dresses, that's pretty liberating. I don't think anyone really expects you to don the full marriage regalia when it's your second time. This makes me lucky because I can eliminate about 90% of the bridal wear that's available out there and narrow my sights to alternative (read: less expensive) options.

In a perfect world, I'd have nothing but time on my hands and I'd be making my own wedding dress right now. I mean, talk about affordable.  Ten buck, tops, for a pattern and maybe $40 for some yardage of really nice shantung silk. I'd actually come in under budget for the dress.  I enjoy sewing, and while I'm nowhere near an expert seamstress, I think with the right pattern (and a lot of hand holding and encouragement) I'd be fine. However, as you recall, we have a two year old and he comes first and that means that on average, I have about 7 minutes of time to focus on hobbies each week. Quite often, most of that time gets used up going to the bathroom instead. I haven't entirely written off the idea of making the dress myself, but it will take some serious strategic maneuvers to make it happen. So while I fantasize in the pages of Butterick and McCalls, I've also got one finger on ebay and craigslist, just to keep my options open. And just for fun, I'm planning a trip to some bridal boutiques to try on dresses.  You know, just to get ideas on shape and fit and style and all that.  And maybe squeal with girlfriends and jump up and down a little. I might be someone's mother, but I'm still a girl.

So I'm flipping through some bridal magazines (that do NOT count as part of the budget, thankyouverymuch, as I intend to cobble them together and make a booster seat out of them) to see what's new and hip and trendy and fashionable these days and let me tell you.  Not much.  I guess the word in 'bridal' is still big, and full, and white, or ecru or eggshell or champagne or ivory or, well, you get the idea.  And I have to wonder: when did emulating meringue become the desired look for your wedding day?  So off I went to do some research.  I'll spare you the detailed history of the wedding dress, because I figure if you're really curious you can read Wikipedia for yourself.  But you know what?  White is a relatively contemporary thing for wedding dresses. And contrary to popular belief, it's not necessarily associated with purity and virginity (that's what blue is for, apparently).  We can thank Queen Victoria in the 1840's for having some white lace she wanted to use and thereby starting a trend.  It became a status thing among the elite, to say, 'Look at me. I'm so rich I can wear this totally impractical white dress that I'll never wear again because it would get dirty and ruined." As apposed to the middle class gal who would have to settle for a nice dress she could wear again and again because it's all she could afford.  So, on that note, I'll leave you with this uplifting little ditty I found, also courtesy of Wikipedia:


Married in white, you will have chosen all right. Married in grey, you will go far away. Married in black, you will wish yourself back. Married in red, you’ll wish yourself dead. Married in blue, you will always be true. Married in pearl, you’ll live in a whirl. Married in green, ashamed to be seen. Married in yellow, ashamed of the fellow. Married in brown, you’ll live out of town. Married in pink, your spirits will sink.”


Saturday, January 30, 2010

Tell me what you really think.

So far, reactions to my undertaking have been varied.  From raised eyebrows, to supportive 'you can do it' to 'I have stuff you can borrow' to just plain 'really?' but with that look that says 'you're crazy.'

I think now is the time to talk about some specifics.  First of all, this is obviously not going to be a full blown, sit down dinner somewhere in the Hamptons for 350 of our closest friends.  That would be impossible to do on a $1,000 budget.  I'm not that crazy.

I just finished reading a book called Altared, edited by Colleen Curran. It's a collection of essays written by women who were asked to talk about their wedding experience.  I highly recommend it, it's a terrific collection. One of the last essays, by Dani Shapiro says: "The ring, the dress, the proposal, the place cards and flowers, the music, the minister or rabbi or justice of the peace-it will all add up to exactly nothing. There will be a moment when it's all over."

And that's what I'm trying to keep in mind as we put this event together.  Yes, I want a Big Day. Yes, I want celebration and friends and family to share it with.  I want pictures to capture the moments I might miss, and a dress to look at and remember it as My Special Wedding Dress. But I want to keep it in perspective as well. It's one day; one day that is the beginning of many we'll have together. I think making out the wedding day to be the biggest and best day of your life is kind of sad.  What does that say about the rest of your days together?

So. Back to the logistics.  A useful tool I found was a budget calculator on www.theknot.com.  The calculator lets you enter the number of guests and your dollar amount, remove categories that are not relevant to your own wedding, and comes up with a breakdown for you. Since we're not planning on having hordes of attendants or a DJ or  a wedding coordinator, there were a lot of categories I could eliminate. So, submitted for your approval, is a break down of my supposed budget (these numbers are based on 40 guests.  The topic of the guest list is another post entirely....but for fun, let's just pretend we've agreed on 40 guests):

Reception Venue Rentals  $80.00
  
Food Service   $300.00

Beverages    $80.00

Cake(s) & Cutting Fee   $25.00

The Gown & Alterations   $60.00
   
Bride's Accessories   $10.00
   
Hair  & Makeup  $5.00

Prewedding Pampering $5.00
   
Groom's Tux or Suit $6.00
 
Groom's Accessories $3.00

Officiant Fee/Donation $10.00
 
Bride's Bouquet $7.50

Groom & Groomsmen Boutonnieres  $2.00
   
Reception Decorations & Centerpieces   $40.00

Ceremony Decorations  $14.00
  
Photographer   $60.00
   
Videographer   $50.00

Additional Prints & Videos   $10.00
   
Invitations & Reply Cards   $25.00

Other Stationery   $5.00
 
His Ring   $10.00
   
Her Ring   $10.00

Favors   $15.00

TOTAL COST OF WEDDING    $832.50

A few things really stick out to me. One, the marriage license fee is missing, and that's an expense we can't get around. I think in Texas it's around $40. Two, it's highly unlikely we'll get anyone to officiate for $10.  Another point that sticks out is that the chance of finding a suitable outfit for my Beloved for $6 seems pretty improbable.  Not impossible, just unlikely. Spending $5 on my hair and makeup apiece isn't going to happen. I'm not that easy. And ten bucks a pop for our rings just doesn't seem practical.  In fact, I'm not going to include the rings in the budget at all because I consider those to be gifts to each other, and our own out of pocket expense. (And also because the ring I have my eye on would pretty much wipe out the entire budget.)

To date I've spent $66 on white Christmas lights in the hopes that we would be able to wind them around all the lovely trees in the backyard of the house we're trying to buy.  According to the 'Ceremony Decorations' category, I'm already over budget.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

The challenge is accepted

So I said to me, "I'll accept your challenge." But before we get too into the nitty gritty, how about a little background on how this came to be, shall we?

As previously stated, I'm a thirty something living in Texas. I met my lovely fee-on-say (I'm new to blogging and can't seem to figure out how to put an accent above an 'e' without causing all kinds of formatting problems. So I'm going to have to get creative until I figure it out.)  in a roundabout sort of way almost 4 years ago, on a cool, drizzly night in Seattle, which was my home town at the time. We hit it off immediately and after some back and forth-ing, I picked up and moved to his hometown, Austin. I was lucky enough to not have to make this giant leap alone. As luck would have it, my nearest and dearest girlfriend in Seattle was ready for a change. She sold her condo, dumped her boyfriend and the two of us spent 6 days in a U-Haul driving across the country. With three cats.

After nearly a year in Austin, we learned a beautiful bouncing baby boy was on the way (whoops) so we moved in together.  As I write this we're in the process of attempting to purchase our first home.

So you can see, I'm not exactly a stickler for tradition.

When my studmuffin proposed on Christmas Day of 2009, I of course said yes and that is how we got here. After a little discussion, we agreed that we want a wedding, and we want people there and food and flowers and all the stuff you think of when you think of weddings. (As apposed to, say, eloping or a quickie Justice of the Peace.)

We're planning a wedding using solely our own financial resources. Since we're a little older than average newly weds, and have been living together and have a child together, it just seemed silly to expect or ask for financial contribution from our families.  (And because when you foot the bill, you call all the shots.)

So we (and by 'we' I mean 'me' because I'm the girl and the one that cares about junk like flowers and candles and themes) are going to have to be creative in how we pull this off. But I'm confident it can be done. I'm so confident it can be done I'm documenting it for the world (or my 3 friends and my mom) to see.

The first thing we did when we came back to earth was start discussing a date. We didn't get very far though, because when you're trying to buy a house with a floating closing date and waffling sellers, that date is awfully hard to nail down. In order to make any solid plans, it'd be helpful to know we're not going to be moving boxes or in the throes of a major kitchen redo when we say our "I do's." So as of right now, the answer to The Big Question is; we don't know. This summer, if the star are aligned.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

In the beginning.......

there was a ring. And that magical, life changing question. There were tears, and congratulations, and champagne and Facebook updating. Followed shortly by the record scratch of reality as we came crashing back to earth when someone said "So. When is the big day?"

Oh right. That. The Big Day. It's called a 'big day' because allegedly it is the most important day of your life, the day you join hands and hearts and commit to thick and thin and sickness and health.  It's not called The Expensive Day, and I think that's for a reason.

So I've decided to propose (tee hee) a challenge to myself. My mission, if I choose to accept it, is to plan a wedding, with guests and flowers and a dress and cake and all the adornments, for $1,000. Think I can do it?

So, in brief, the who, what, when, where, and why are:

Who: Me, thirtysomething bride to be

What: a wedding with flair on a budget that won't break the bank

When: I'll have to get back to you on that

Where: ditto

Why: Because I like a challenge. Because we're in our thirties and it seems silly to expect financial help from our families.  Because I'm practical and reasonable and feel like the 'average' wedding setting you back twenty grand or more isn't for us. Because, let's be honest, we'd rather drop the big dough on the honeymoon.